Today I was at my local farm stand, picking up my share of veggies from the Community Supported Agriculture farm. And I was surprised to run into my son’s old swimming instructor, who I loved but haven’t seen for several years. The first thing beyond saying hi was to talk to me about an article they ran in a local newspaper almost two years ago now about my podcast. It turns out her family has had a ton of ADHD, and have sufferred some negative consequences by not getting early intervention for the kids.
We had a great talk about how ADHD can effect families, and how getting kids help as early as possible is key. She had actually been diagnosed as an adult, which came with a sense of pain and relief all in one. The relief came from understanding that many of the diffculties she had all her life had a reason, a name. They weren’t just because she was “stupid” or a “failure” or “couldn’t get it” like everyone else. The pain came from feeling so badly about herself and her potential for so many years, from underachieving, and then finding out there was something that could have been done to help many years ago, had she realized what it was.
Her daughter, who received help in high school is now on Dean’s list in College and is studying to be a teacher herself. I think this makes the pain all the more real, in a “there but for the grace of god go I” sense of things. My friend asked for my card so she could pass things along to her daughter, so we can all help kids with LD as soon as possible, and stop the years of pain we have both felt as adults diagnosed with ADHD.
It amazed me that two years after the fact, people still remember and comment on this article when I run into them. It amazes me that my podcast and blogging has an impact, when for so many years, I felt helpless and voiceless and simply no good whatsoever. Despite my many achievements, everything rang hollow because I never felt good about myself, or understood why I got only 80% of what I wanted to do accomplished, always seeming to fall short of the ultimate goal. Once I finally figured out that ADHD was part of that cycle of failure, I can now anticipate the feelings of being overwhelmed; I can break complex tasks down into managable steps and take one at a time. That has been a true blessing.
I still have a day to day struggle with staying organized and dealing with feeling overwhelmed and like I will never get anything accompished, so why bother? But then I sit down, make a few lists and start attacking one thing at a time, and progress starts to happen- and more miraculously, completion happens, too.
Sharing my experiences and those of my family are having a positive impact on others, in ways I can’t always see and feel. But running into someone I haven’t seen for such a long time, and knowing that just discussing topics like LD in the open make a difference in their lives, well, that makes all of this podcasting and blogging worth while.
The take home message here is this- never underestimate the impact you can have when you try to help other people- the ripples you cause may be far more wide spread than you ever know. And when you find out that you have made a difference, that feeling is one of the best and most sustaining you can have. You may not be able to change the course of the world in one day, but each little positive thing you do has far-reaching consequences you can’t possibly contemplate or imagine.
Good Karma is a wonderful thing.
Photo graciously provided by Perla*, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved
3 responses so far ↓
Chris // Aug 1, 2008 at 7:13 am
Whitney, thanks for posting about this! I didn’t realize you struggle with ADD. My family is just a few months into the “journey of discovery,” facing my husband’s possible job loss (thanks to his ADD), my lifelong underachievement, and now our daughter’s exasperating inattentiveness. It’s a relief, as so many have said, to know that it isn’t some personal character that causes these problems, but a neurobiological disorder that we cannot cure, but at least we can learn to cope with. I am so looking forward to finally being able to accomplish things and I am so glad we’re going to be able to help our daughter while she’s young…that she won’t have to wait ’til she’s 40+ to figure this stuff out for herself.
Keep up the great work! You are making a difference.
STL Mom // Aug 3, 2008 at 5:42 pm
I recently discovered your LD podcast, and I just listened to a couple of them today while on a plane. I find them very helpful and appreciate the work you put into making them.
I think it is great to be open about your own and your family’s struggles, because it helps other people, and it decreases the stigma if you talk about it as if it is just another family situation. Adults are often startled when my daughter announces that she has a learning disability, but kids usually say, “Oh, what’s that?” and listen politely to her response. She’s ready to educate the world!
Kate // Aug 5, 2008 at 5:27 pm
I read something ages ago that said (paraphrase) “The impact of what you do many never be known to you but it will be known by those it impacts”. We all educate every day, sounds like you’re teaching the world the good stuff!
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