This post was written by many, many moms… please add you’re contributions in the comments section.
You know you’re a mom when:
1. … you can no longer wear black, for fear of massive spit up marks
2. …you sing “Dora Dora Dora the Explorer” in the shower.
3. … you believe that macaroni and cheese should become it’s own food group.
4. … play dates have taken over your life!
5. …you sing to the Elmo CD that is playing on your radio long after you’ve dropped your children off at daycare.
6. …you can’t wait to hug your own kids after you see something troubling on the news.
7. …you lick your finger to wipe the face of a child AND suddenly stop when you realize that child ISN’T YOURS!
8. …your baby is sick down your front. It misses your t-shirt and trickles down your chest and you are actually happy – because now it saves you having to rake around trying to find anything remotely keen to wear.
9. …you reach into your pocket and pull out a crayon, a matchbox car and a dirty sock.
10. …you have no issues sniffing another person’s butt for a poopie diaper.
11. …you think yourself lucky to get out of the house without visible a spit-up
stain.
12. …a night on the town means taking the kids out past 6 pm.
13. …a packet of crisps (chips), and a chocolate bar is considered a hearty breakfast.
14. …you count the days until your next girl’s night.
15. …your purse contains packages of Pepperage farm goldfish, a juice box, assorted wrappers and a binky.
16. …you give up your cool car for a minivan, and within a few weeks, you really start to like the van, and use phrases like “It’s just so convenient.” And you really mean it.
17. …you memorize and juggle more schedules and activities than American Airlines, and when people ask you where you live, you say, “In a tan minivan on I-95″
18. …you end up tying your husband’s shoes, or cutting your in-laws meat, before you realize your doing it.
19. …you ask where “the potty” is.
20. …you look through family pictures, and realize there aren’t very many of you, because you are always behind the camera yourself.
21. …you begin to wonder whether fed-exing the kids to grandma’s is an idea who’s time has come.
22. “whine” is no longer simply red or white.
23. …when people ask you what you do, you tell them you are a “pediatric logistics specialist”!
24. …sleeping in means… sleeping IN the middle of three little bodies!!!
25. …you just gave your kids two kittens even though you’re allergic to cats!
26. …you’d rather listen to your 6 year old’s music than your own.
27. …when you walk into another room in your house to get something and by the time
you get there you forget what you were going to get.
Your turn…
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17 responses so far ↓
Erin // Nov 11, 2006 at 6:05 am
That was the best laugh I have had all night – Thanks!
Here is my contribution:
…you are looking at the movies section of the newspaper and you run to tell your husband about the new animated movie coming out.
… you start using words like goobly gobley in everyday conversation.
You know you’re a mum when… at Littlemummy.Com // Nov 11, 2006 at 4:27 pm
[...] Join the conversation at GNMParents [...]
Annie // Nov 13, 2006 at 12:14 am
…you buy “Cars” for your son, and you and your hubby watch it instead
…you proudly put a Mom’s Group sticker on your car and hope someone will notice it.
…you find Legos in the most unusual places in your house, and you aren’t surprised at all.
…you watch the Disney Channel, Noggin and Nickelodeon on a daily basis, even after you drop your kids at preschool.
….you sing Wiggles songs in the shower. With all the right words. And on-key.
The Lazy Organizer // Nov 13, 2006 at 7:02 am
35. …you clap when someone goes potty.
36. …cleaning by yourself is no longer a chore. It’s a vacation!!!
whymommy // Nov 19, 2006 at 1:57 am
37 … you never leave the house without a snack, a juice, and a spare outfit,
38 … the Metro seems way too quiet without little children squirming in the seats, and
39 … you excitedly shout “Scoop!” when you pass construction equipment on the highway … and your kids aren’t even in the car!
Michelle // Feb 9, 2007 at 6:01 am
Very funny–
. . . when you find Legos in your bra?
True story.
Marie // Oct 22, 2007 at 1:39 pm
…When you go to the fridge, takes the milk- bottle out to have a sip and you don’t notice that the nipple is still on it.
nadine // Oct 23, 2007 at 4:07 am
when your idea of ‘A night in with the girls’ involves princess dresses, fake make-up and making beaded necklaces.
Amy // Nov 5, 2007 at 11:46 am
When your child pukes… & you CATCH IT!
When someone else’s kid pukes at a party… & you keep eating!
Christine // Dec 23, 2007 at 9:34 am
…When you take a shower you either have a child or bath tub toys at your feet.
…When you go to use the bathroom you count the seconds before one of your children or your husband come knocking at the door.
…When your Tivo is loaded with more kid shows than your own shows.
…When your out with your friends and all you can think of to talk about is your kids.
…When you tell jokes, you realize they are the goofy ones your kids made up.
Lisa-Marie // Feb 23, 2009 at 6:44 pm
I have one!
51……… when you have had the pleasure of saying, “no you may not stick grapes up your sister’s nose!”
Lisa-Marie // Feb 23, 2009 at 6:47 pm
52…….when you child wants to throw a magic show, and you have been forced to say, “Absolutly Not! You cannot saw your little brother in half!”
rosemarie padilla // Sep 23, 2009 at 6:12 am
those are so funny i have one that’s pretty good too
the only song you can think of is “elmo’s world”and you know all the words to the song
rosemarie padilla // Sep 23, 2009 at 6:14 am
when your still trying to give your older kids “spit baths”
Laurie J // Dec 9, 2009 at 9:39 pm
When you go to find a pen to write your babysitter a check, and have to write it in red crayon.
Happened today; had a great laugh!
Latisha D // May 13, 2010 at 11:34 pm
When you go to put on your shoe in the morning and both shoes are full of crayons, toy cars, and little men…OUCH
Melissa S // Jul 21, 2010 at 1:25 pm
you would rather spend your free evening trashing the nursery by dragging out every toy, spilling juice & snacks all over the floor, coloring the balcony with chalk-then walking in it-only to come inside and see how many chalk footprints you can make, coloring on the wall & floor, smashing cereal into the carpet and pulling all the pillows off of the sofa and beds- just so your kids can take it easy tomorrow
you are a mommy when you cuddle with your children even when they are sick with runny noises, fevers and a yucky cough and you could care less if you catch it.
when most of the artwork in the house is the result of your toddler finding a crayon or marker!
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