The other day, I was scanning my daughter’s room for dishwasher fodder, when I chanced upon her combination lock for her school phys-ed locker. As I looked at it, I saw that the combination was written on tape attached to the side. I asked her, why? Why put your combination on the lock? Her reply was, “I do it every summer, so when school starts the next year, I can re-memorize it.”
My first thought was, “Genius!”
My second thought was, “Well, be careful. Don’t say that out loud, people will think you’re bragging.”
Except my son was in her room, and he must have had that same thought, because we both looked at each other and said, “Genius!” out loud. That made me feel better, that somebody else saw it. And this other somebody was my son, who is arguably my daughter’s harshest critic.
This all lead me to where we are right now, you and I, as you read this very sentence. My thinking is this: Why do we shy away from talking proudly, loudly about our kids? Why did we allow social conservativism to invade our parental soul?
I argue that it’s a good thing to brag about your kid, to bore your friends with tales of the great brain-power of your child. It’s your kid, why not brag? Why not praise them at top volume from the top of the Sears Tower? If they are your friend, they’ll know you, care for you, and be happy for you. And if they’re not your friend, what do you care? Better to have your kid know how impressed you are with them, that your respect for them is boundless, than to give a tinker’s cuss about what the neighbor’s might think.
by Stu Mark
Photo graciously provided by B Tal, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved
7 responses so far ↓
Anita B // Aug 18, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Amen! I’m tired of caring about what others think! I’m going to shout it from the mountaintops! My kid’s a genius!
Danger Mouse // Aug 19, 2008 at 1:20 pm
If I had any children, I’m sure it would be extremely difficult to not brag about them. I enjoy bragging about and praising my friends. I don’t see the difference.
STL Mom // Aug 19, 2008 at 4:00 pm
I don’t have an issue with bragging, as long as it doesn’t lead to comparing, or one-upmanship. I think that’s why bragging gets a bad name.
Meg // Aug 19, 2008 at 4:43 pm
stl brings up a good point. I brag on my kids all of the time, but I try and select an appropriate audience. I pretty much think that expressing pride to the kids is all good.
There’s a lot of reasons while I exercise caution. My kids are so much better (smarter, kinder, funnier, stronger) than yours that I wouldn’t want you to feel bad about it. I am joking btw. That was a joke.
But seriously, there is a lot of guilt and should’ves in the parenting sphere. In some cases I think bragging can fuel that. There are a lot of comparisons and assumptions that are made regularly.
Just a thought.
And like I said- I brag about my kids a lot.
Is it fuel for the mommy (parent) wars?
What do you think??
Amberlynn // Aug 21, 2008 at 9:24 am
Much more important than what the neighbors think, is what your kids think.
Imagine how they feel when overhearing you brag on them to someone else. Likely, they feel great. Indirect flattery is the best!
Supplementing School | GNMParents // Nov 13, 2008 at 6:18 am
[…] one isn’t easy for me to write, but after re-reading Stu’s August post about bragging, and the comments that came with it, I decided not to worry too much about […]
Christy // Nov 13, 2008 at 4:24 pm
Your daughter had a great idea and it’s worth saying so! I think you need to hang around more with moms. We have no problem whatsoever bragging about our children. =}
Leave a Comment