Winter is the worst time to be a parent who stays at home.
Typically, I would also be working, writing a weekly column for a travel site that is preparing to launch. But the preparations are keeping my editor busy right now, and with 13 columns stored up in her files, I am not needed at the moment.
So my days are long, unbroken by a life of the mind that was so hard to achieve. While the break was welcome during my difficult first trimester, now I am staring at weeks and months of cold, brown days in which I must conjure activities and fun for my preschooler while I gestate her sibling.
I don’t regret making the decision to leave the traditional workforce. After all, isn’t that what the women who came before worked so hard to achieve? The opportunity for choice. Because, as I discovered, none of the options are perfect. But at least we have that, the autonomy to make a choice.
I know even that is a pipe dream, that many of our sisters and brothers do not have a choice. They must work to provide the simplest of human needs - food, shelter, clothing. In this, I know I am blessed.
This knowledge - or, more accurately, this guilt - makes me feel a spoiled child. Metaphorically stamping my feet over the dreary months ahead, crafts and stories and the same four walls for days on end.
In the hierarchy of suffering, mine is minor. A handful of temper tantrums and crackers spread on an already dirty carpet is more than bearable.
But still, I look out at the relentless beige of the dead cornfield behind my house, lacking the ambition for coats and mittens, and I dream, longingly, of spring.
by A.L. Hatch
[tags]kids, children, parents, pregnancy, family, siblings, life, food, shelter, necessities, reflection, growth, Spring[/tags]
Photo graciously provided by Ennor, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved
9 responses so far ↓
slouching mom // Feb 12, 2008 at 11:12 am
that’s certainly how i feel today — because both my boys are home for a snow day.
but as kids get older, not only do they entertain themselves most of the time, but they are in school for much longer stretches of the day.
it gets better, promise.
Sarcasta-Mom // Feb 13, 2008 at 8:25 am
Working moms and stay-at-home moms each face their own battles. While I often wish I could stay home with the kids, I know how much work it is. Entertaining little ones is hard work, not to mention the contstant cleaning, etc. Good luck keeping busy
Emily // Feb 13, 2008 at 9:43 am
I feel this way often. Waiting to hear from my agent on revisions, I sit around, not a working mom, not a SAHM.
LifeAsIKnowIt // Feb 13, 2008 at 10:02 am
I can relate!
And today, a snow day, leaves me with a 6 year old to entertain too.
And yes, I feel like a spoiled brat for complaining about it too…
Waiting Amy // Feb 13, 2008 at 10:38 am
Ugh! I’m tired of complaining about it too. But the days are endless. And it doesn’t help when the cavalry calls and announces they won’t arrive until after bedtime.
Here’s hoping Puxatauny Phil was wrong, and spring is around the corner.
De (Sober Briquette) // Feb 13, 2008 at 11:26 am
it’s the monotony. It blankets my brain like the new fallen snow, and all of my thoughts are muffled.
I need a strong dose of the sun.
Heather // Feb 13, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Dare I say it? It won’t be long before your preschooler is in school all day. I miss having my daughter at home with me.
Arkie Mama // Feb 13, 2008 at 1:42 pm
Me too. Looking for spring I mean.
I hate this time of year. Grey and depressing. I’ll take 90 degrees with sunshine any day.
Defiantmuse // Feb 13, 2008 at 4:11 pm
I go through this often. The whole “I chose to do this (stay home) and I know I’m really lucky to be able to and I shouldn’t complain but it’s driving me absolutely crazy and if I have to play peek-a-boo one more time I’m going to seriously lose my shit”.
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