Daughters, How Do You Survive?

November 10th, 2009 by Rocket Science Mom · 5 Comments

I have two children. One boy and one girl. I love them both with all of my heart. I have written here a few times about dealings with my son, but have seldom written about my daughter. I was thinking about why that is and believe that in a lot of ways, I am still at a loss as to how to be the mother of a girl.

When I had my son, I felt fairly confident in being a mom. I am not a typical girly-girl myself, and was always more drawn to math, science, Legos, and the like. You will hardly find any dresses in my closet. I have spent most of my life in the company of men: college, graduate school, my work as an engineer. Most of the people I come into contact with and consider friends are men. I am very comfortable dealing with those of the masculine.

Yet, I am blessed with the most girly of little girls in my second child. I even used her desire to wear dresses to school as the carrot to get her to potty train and still use it try to get her to stay in her bed through the night.

She’s one of the most charming, strong-willed, independant women I have ever met, and often pushes those personality “muscles” against me, the other main female example in her lift, on a daily basis. I love her to bits and am really proud of her and the person she is becoming. She is absolutely going to change the world.

Still, when it comes to relating to her and dealing with her emotional issues, I sometimes feel as though we come from different worlds. It’s a struggle to be the parent of a girl; a job I never thought I’d be any good at. The jury is still out on whether or not I am.

Every day I hope to be the best Mom I can be, to both my son and my daughter. Every day they inspire and impress me. I only hope that I can do the same in return.

by Rocket Science Mom

Photo graciously provided by Yelnoc, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

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5 responses so far ↓

AmyL // Nov 10, 2009 at 10:30 pm

I bet you’re doing a better job than you think. Being sensitive to your differences is a big deal; not everyone pays attention to that detail.

I wouldn’t have a clue how to parent a girl. Even though I tease about wanting one, I am much more comfortable with what I already know: boys.
Stephanie // Nov 11, 2009 at 6:21 pm

Daughters can be really tough to raise. There’s so much pushing them to be into princesses and other girly stuff. Sometimes it’s hard to get my daughter to realize that there are few things that boys can do that girls can’t do just as well. Hard for her to see that when her friends tell her different.
Kelly D // Nov 11, 2009 at 9:46 pm

I’m not much of a girly-girl myself, but my twin daughters are. I too have a lot of male friends and my clients and associates in business tend to be male. My mom really encouraged my girls to be girly and I think this is in part because I wasn’t as a little girl. Sometimes I feel like I have to tone their girlyness down!

But they are too cute and really well behaved. I’m just hoping this continues into the teen years! Good luck to you as well.
Kelly D // Nov 11, 2009 at 9:46 pm

I’m not much of a girly-girl myself, but my twin daughters are. I too have a lot of male friends and my clients and associates in business tend to be male. My mom really encouraged my girls to be girly and I think this is in part because I wasn’t as a little girl. Sometimes I feel like I have to tone their girliness down!

But they are too cute and really well behaved. I’m just hoping this continues into the teen years! Good luck to you as well.
STL Mom // Nov 12, 2009 at 8:10 am

Once my daughter’s friend asked if they could play with my makeup. When I told her that all I had was some powder and lip gloss, she was appalled. “I have more makeup than that!” she said, “And I’m only nine years old!”

I don’t know how old your daughter is, but my daughter went through a very girly-girl phase from about age 3 to age 7. Now she wants to wear green, gray, or brown instead of pink and purple. She’s gone from twirly skirts and dresses to jeans and sweatpants. She’s played with makeup at her friend’s house but has no interest in it herself.
But I’m sure that just when I least expect it, all her tastes and interests will change again!